Waiting for messages. One came.
I thought it was who I was waiting for, but it was something unexpected.
My mum had sent me a sms, saying : Wai gong has passed away.
I don't know what came over me at that time; was is sadness? relief?
I remember saying before that I would not cry if my grandfather passed on, as he constantly chided my grandmother for being "Useless, lousy" and stuff like that. I thought that his existence was worthless, as he expected everybody to bow to him & he always treated people as if they were trash.
At this point, my heart and mind were in turmoil. I really didn't know what to do; cry, or not?
I tried to steel my heart and not cry, but while talking about what my grandfather did to my grandmother to Vernice halfway, made me break down. In the midst of lunch @ Pizza Hut. There was silence for about five minutes as Vernice let my tears fall freely.
I try to think of the things that my grandfather had done for me.
None. I can't remember anything. Except for the very first two pets I had: 2 turtles.
I really can't think anything now. Even if I laugh, its just part of a facade I've decided to put on.
I've nothing more to say.
I feel really messed up right now. My tears are threatening to fall again.
Won't be in school on monday.
Cya.
